Hi guys. Got a call from my oncologist concerned about my heart still and the meds I would need to keep my cancer away for 5-10 years (immunotherapy.). My oncologist and my cardiologist are very concerned that the meds I would need to take to keep my cancer out of my body will affect my heart more. They have been running EKGs on me and have found that my heart is beating very fast. My cardiologist also discovered after my heart surgery that I have a Prolonged QT .
[Long QT syndrome(LQTS) is a heart rhythm condition that can potentially cause fast, chaotic heartbeats. These rapid heartbeats might trigger a sudden fainting spell or seizure. In some cases, the heart can beat erratically for so long that it causes sudden death.] Prolonged QT causes many many medicines to worsen my QT and can cause heart attacks and death. So now my doctors are once again coming up with a different game plan to keep my heart pumping healthily and to keep the cancer out of my body.
We are thinking that the new game plan will consist of another surgery ughh. They would like to remove my ovaries since my cancer is estrogen related. They need to get me into menopause asap basically to keep the high amount of estrogen out of my body. By taking out the ovaries it will then take the immunotherapy meds out of the picture- which will then keep my heart healthy and me alive and hopefully healthy lol.
Also in the works is another PET scan to make sure my cancer has not spread along with the normal weekly blood work for my coumadin levels. I am also needing my expanders out of my chest and hoping to get my breast implants in also. There may be a chance that they can exchange the expanders out for implants while orthoscopically removing my ovaries. It all depends on getting the OK for bridging my coumadin long enough during the surgery.
Even though all of this is happening- life still continues on over here! There is no pause button over here. We all continue on as normal and deal with these jabbs as they come. Plain and simple.
But- I would like a little break from all this health crap but I don't see that happening anytime soon
like I thought. Not gonna lie though.. I am pissed off, kinda sick of loosing my female body parts, grumpy as hell and definitely over this shit. I have a very low tolerance for this crap now. I am pretty sure my kids and husband are feeling the same way too lol.
I definitely appreciate life a whole hella of a lot more since heart surgery in February and since my nightmare is continuing. My view on a messy house is fuck it! My view on being able to coach and do pitching lessons makes my heart happy and full. My view on my family is- they are my family and no matter what we all love each other!! Shit- I even wear a damn Sam's Club tankini with shorts bathing suit for 24.99- which would of never happened before cancer- but being with my kids in the pool is more important than worrying if I look like a damn beached blubbery whale!! Just sayin.. Lol.
My view on dying now is- I am no longer scared of dying. Cancer took that fear away! I am fine with dying as long as I have hugged and kissed my babies and told them Mama always will love them. I now know that Jarrod can handle anything that comes his way and will take amazing care of
his babies like he does now!
I just wanna live!! I want to eat ice cream when I want, I want to be there for my babies all the time, I want my marriage to be good again, I wanna feel healthy enough to ride my beach cruiser around, I want to be able to lay out by the pool or at the beach without worrying that the whole right side of my body will swell up from my fuckin lymphodema. I appreciate so many more things in my life that three years ago I would of taken for granted. I just want to "be." That is it. i just need to "be" for a while. I will always fight on- but it is very tiring and very hard sometimes.
No matter what is going on in my life or in yours- it is still so very important to prioritize what is needed in your life because we are not promised tomorrow!! Live your life like your favorite song is
playing 24/7!! Because this your life. And this is my life and in my head my favorite song on repeat is Fergalicious!! Lol!! Perfect song to feel good, dance around shakin my big ass, cackle and kick cancer's ass with. Plus- my kids love the song too so dance party on repeat!! Lol
That is it for now. I will keep you all posted as I receive more info!
Xo
Amy I love you very much- Heidi
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